Tuesday, November 28, 2006

It's Time

Over the past few years it has become apparent that the United States is in dire need of change. Some of you may find the prospect of electing an asparagus as President of the United States as unusual or even laughable. But in truth, fruits and vegetables have played a pivotal role in the way our modern world has developed. They supply us with our daily vitamin requirements from Vitamin A for healthy, skin eyes and hair, Vitamin C for bones and cartilage and Vitamin K which is essential for blood-clotting all the way to folate for developing the nervous system, and to a lesser extent manganese which helps Asian cartoon characters with carbohydrate and fat metabolism and is necessary for the formation of bone and sex hormones. All of these are essential in continuing our very existence on this earth and yet when was the last time a vegetable or fruit was ever elected into congress at any level? Can the current President of the United States prevent raised cholesterol levels, nerve disorders and intestinal problems in millions of people? No. And yet it is a simple task performed everyday by the lowly rockmelon or a punnet of strawberries. Not even the world's most powerful man can produce energy from carbohydrates, protein and fat inside the body and yet a regular bowl of split pea soup will take this challenge in it's stride. It is time the people of America stand up and say 'Enough is enough!' How can we trust our Commander in Chief if he is not even capable of preventing liver disease or neural tube defects in unborn babies. This is where Asparagus officinalis comes in. Not only is the asparagus able to prevent both of these, it is important for blood cell growth and is a good source of rutin, which is ideal for strengthening capillary walls. Not only would the asparagus be a powerful adversy in the fight against these issues, it can also be boiled or steamed until tender and served with a light sauce or melted butter or with a drizzle of olive oil and a dusting of Parmesan cheese. The asparagus has copped some flack in the past over it's tendency to cause a distinctive, unpleasant odor in urine when consumed, however after recognition in Peru, China and Mexico as the number one export providing work for thousands of people, such a consequence to eating it is trivial in comparison. And besides, who amongst us can honestly say that President Bush hasn't tainted their urine with foul-smelling amino acids recently?

More information on the fight to place a sprout vegetable in office to follow.